Nothing but my Reality Check

I've been in a slight "blogging funk"...if you will...the last couple of days. I think my body and brain are both just exhausted, and I just can't think of anything to say.

It has been rather busy over the holiday break. I just realized tonight while walking down the aisles of the grocery store that the break was almost over. Time passes so quickly. Although Big Dan hasn't been home much (except when it was time to rack up..lol), I have so enjoyed spending this time with Little Ann. We have done lots of shopping, visiting friends, and we've watched lots of movies together.

It currently looks like a tornado hit my bedroom. Last night we blew up an air mattress so Little Ann could sleep in my floor. Her daddy was home and she wanted to sleep near me. Pete wanted to know how long that was going to last, and I assured him only during what was left of Christmas break. I just laughed to myself when I saw him stumble over 3 American Girl dolls in a make shift bed right beside her and about 10 stuffed animals in my floor. It definitely didn't leave much room for walking. As frustrating as her messes are sometimes, I know one day I will look around and wish for something to clean up.

Speaking of Little Ann.....although this has nothing to do with anything, she just came in here and told me she wishes I would have named her "Alice". Don't know what that's all about.

I had a little reality check tonight. One of my best scrapbooking friends' daughter had a baby today , but not only that... Pete's mamaw had back surgery. I love babies. I guess maybe I could've had 6 or 7 and been happy, but I guess God knew what would be best for me. When I was pregnant with Little Ann, I often questioned myself. I wondered how I could possibly love my new daughter with as much love as I had for my son. Did I actually have enough to go around? Oh, I did. It's still hard to understand how a mother can have so much love in her heart...and it just never goes away, no matter how many "I hate you's" she hears.

After visiting with my friend and swaddling that precious newborn baby girl, we moved up to the next floor to visit Pete's mamaw. She will be 88 in March and is in the hospital for back surgery because she fell off a ladder. A ladder people. Why would you climb a ladder if you were 88? But nothing much gets this woman down. It's unbelievable how good she still looks and acts at her age. As I looked at her petite 95 pound body lying there, I wondered just how many more years of life she actually had in her. And just as my friend's new baby was entering into this world....I know it won't be very many more years before she will be leaving...because that's what we do. We are born into this world, and then we leave it.

So many things are swimming around in my head right now. I mean what if I am drawing closer to my time of leaving. Really, none of us have the assurance of tomorrow.

James 4:14 - Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour that appeareth for a little time and then vanisheth away.

So what is my life? How will I spend my 2009? What will remain the same? What will I change? What will I do for God who brought me in to this world and can just as easily take me out? I know that despite conflicts in my marriage, unloving words spouted off to my children, bad decisions I continue to make, whatever it may be dragging me down... that ultimately my happiness lies within myself. I know that my life will be just exactly what I make it.

Traditions and a little Chaos

I can't believe Christmas is already over. I spend so much time preparing...shopping, wrapping, decorating, cooking and all of a sudden, the celebrations have ended and I'm left with a barren tree, a house full of empty boxes, trash and dirty dishes. I know it is all worth it though when I see the big smiles on my children's faces.

Little Ann held tight to her list, making sure we followed the order of operations. Luckily she remembered our yearly traditions and had listed things in order anyway, so as we went with the flow of our Christmas Eve evening, it all naturally fell into place.

Christmas Eve has traditionally become the time we spend with my side of the family. My family isn't very big as I only have one sibling and once my grandparents passed away, everyone began to branch off establishing their own traditions with their immediate families. This year my parents weren't able to make it so it was just Pete, the kids and I, and my brother's family. Which believe me....with 3 boys and Big Dan to ag it all on..was all the chaos we needed.

The food was all delish as usual and once the tables were cleared and food put away, we began our highly competitive traditional game of Bingo. After Bingo, we managed to fulfill another of our family traditions being our family photo, but not without lots of grumbling.

You can't tell it though. We managed to get a smile out of everyone..surprisingly.

The present opening came after the picture and is usually what takes up the majority of the night. We are slow and it took Pete awhile to get used to our way of doing things. His family is so different than mine where presents are concerned. They waste no time with their opening, but we try to make it last by giving each person their own turn and full attention. These are a few of the happy faces from the night's gift giving.

For all you "non-country" folk out there, this is a three dimensional deer target. This is what the poor man asked for ya'll, so don't be giving me those eyebrows. Jeff Foxworthy may've said it best..."You might be a redneck if.....". lol.

I must say..one of the highlights of the night was listening to my brother's 3 year old repeat his newly learned phrase....."What in the heck?" as loudly as possible every single time someone opened a new gift. Look at his mouth and get a mental picture. Hi.lari.ous.

After all the gifts were opened and we all did trash patrol, the kids, once again followed Little Ann's schedule and took the telescope out to find Santa

all the while running in and out to track him on the Santa tracker as well. Hmmmm..is he close?

And where there are boys, you will most likely always find some level of chaos...especially with little (and big) boys who have just inhaled an extreme amount of sugar, opened lots of new toys, and are anxiously awaiting Santa. Needless to say, there was lots of this going on...

And thanks to Aunt Scrapper Mom who buys the most awesome gifts ever, a nerf gun, and a boy who subconsciously doesn't want to grow up (especially on Christmas), there was quite a lot of this too...

But Christmas Eve and all of our Christmas Eve traditions finally came to an end, Santa arrived at the home of Scrapper Mom and here are my sweet babies on Christmas morning. This was such a bittersweet morning for Big Dan. Does Santa still come see you after you graduate High School?

Awww... I must say, these moments are few and far between.

I won't bore you with the list of everything everyone got from Santa, but I will tell you, I think the Wii was the favorite. I haven't played the ping pong yet, but I'm ready to take any of them. I rock at ping pong!

The rest of Christmas day, we spent with Pete's family. The girls.....

Some of the guys...(I bet you'd never guess they were watching football, would you?)

And I know I have probably more than used my share of picture allotment for the day's post, but I just have to show you Pete's sister's tree. It was small, but adorable.

I hope everyone had a wonderful Holiday!!!

Christmas Reflections

This will probably be my last post until after Christmas. I've been contemplating this post for a while now, thinking of just exactly what I wanted to say and what pictures I wanted to include. I'm not sure if it will come together just like I have it pictured or not, but I'm gonna try. Have I ever mentioned that I absolutely love blogging? There is just something so liberating about it. Whether I have readers or even commenters, I blog as much for myself, I think, as I do for you. It makes me dig deep inside my soul to bring out who I am. It forces me to remember things I have tucked away, and things that I have so much trouble remembering as I approach the age of 40. It brings me to old albums to search for just the right picture for the post I am preparing....and I could go on and on. And I have met so many wonderful people in the process. Thank you for continuing to be a faithful follower. I can only hope I will develop more friendships in the future as I continue my blogging endeavor.

Today, for myself, I want to reflect back on some of my most memorable Christmases. Starting with what I am assuming to be 1973 or 74 or something like that. Bear with me on these old photos. I've had to scan them while inside the album and there is some discoloring. (Did I mention being close to 40??)

I don't remember much about this Christmas, but I do love looking at how pretty my mother dressed me. And I got so tickled at how far her Christmas tree decorating has come over the past years.

This next photo must have come sometime after 1975. I'm assuming I was around 6 and my brother 2. Little Ann thinks Santa looks corny. I agree he does need somewhat of a makeover.

I love looking at our nappy heads every Christmas morning. And did anybody else have one of those Fisher Price hospitals? Remember the dinging elevator? You can't see here, but I was missing a few front teeth in some of the other photos from this morning. I must've been singing "All I want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth".

Let's fast forward a few years. Eventually, I did grow up. I graduated high school and moved into my own apartment in my college town. This is where I had my first taste of independence in so many ways. I remember how all I really wanted to be was a mother. I was always so afraid the rapture would occur before I had that opportunity. Little did I know what being a mother would behold for me, but I knew it would be special. I loved to play house...even in college and dreamed of what kind of wife I would make when that time came. I remember being so excited to go buy my own tree....(even though it was the cheapest one Walmart had at the time) and the limbs highly resembled the toilet brush I had in my bathroom. I was so proud of my table setting. Pretty good for 18 years old, huh?

Fast forward another couple of years when motherhood became a reality (a little earlier than expected), but I love this picture.

And I love this boy and wouldn't have had it any other way.

And this precious boy is now 18 years old himself, but I don't think he's too much into setting tables for the holidays.

My husband came into the picture when Big Dan was almost 3. He moved himself right out of his bachelor pad with a stereo and a big electric skillet into a home Big Dan and I already occupied. We didn't have much money then...(haha and still don't), but we lived on love. This is our first Christmas together along with Big Dan, my brother and his girlfriend (which is now his wife).

We'll move forward another 5 years to December 1998 which was Little Ann's first Christmas. Where Big Dan was an October baby and only 2 months old for his first, she was 9 months old and very, very busy. We had sold our little house in preparation for a bigger one where Little Ann could have her own room. We were renting a itty bitty one bedroom house while we built with a living room so tiny, I only had room for 1/2 a tree. Yes, 1/2 a tree. The front half in front of the window. It worked pretty well until Little Ann decided to pull it over. She has always been a little mischevious. Pete had to tie it to the wall with fishing line to keep her under control. That was a small house, and we were cooped up in it together for over 12 months, but we had some great times there.

In October of 1999, we were able to move into our new home where we've spent many more Christmases together and made lots of memories.

I love looking back at what the kids received and the smiles on their faces...nappy heads and all.

And although time has continued to pass me by, the memories will continue to linger and new ones will be made. Here is to a wonderful holiday season. May the Lord richly bless you in the new year. Please remember that He truly is the reason for this wonderful season.

Merry Christmas to you all.

A Christmas-y Weekend Wrap

First of all, let me start this post with a warning for ya. I love pictures, so I'm letting everyone know up front that this post will be long and full of photographs! Maybe you won't get too bored looking at my Little Ann during our Christmas-y weekend.

The Girl Scouts got to go to the County Courthouse to view their ornament on the big tree, sing Christmas carols with the County Judge and eat refreshments.

We had to go up to the 2nd floor to be able to see our ornament which meant Little Ann wasn't getting anywhere near it. She has a height phobia, but agreed to let me get her picture by the wall.

Christmas presents came a little early for my brother's kids and Little Ann. Meemaw and Papaw wanted them to come open their gifts and spend Friday night with them. They always get so much on Christmas Eve and get lost in all the chaos. This way they could enjoy what they got that night. Unfortunately Big Dan had to work, but if I know my practical parents, I'm sure his gift will be waiting in the bank for his future "hard times".

Here is Little Ann with her new point and shoot....a girl after her mother's heart. The newest photographer in the family.

And run for your life! It's the Hulk 3 year old style!

Remember this night? The kids were all so excited to get their parent's and grandparent's gifts with their behavior bucks. They were so much more eager for my mom and dad to open than they were to even get their own presents.

And I totally don't want to gross anybody out, but on this same night, my dad surprised my mom with $500 big ones so she could go buy her a laptop. The sweetest thing is that they are in retirement, so he had gone out and cut several loads of logs to sell to the mill so he could do that for her. I can only hope I am this happy after 40 years of being married to the one I love.

Here is my little "lady in red" hamming it up for the camera. She is all decked out in meemaw's new scarf and mittens, wearing her bow while holding her new red camera. So stunning..dahling.

We had a busy morning today. Of course, being the Sunday before Christmas meant our choir's performance, lots of wonderful holiday food, and back into the sanctuary for the children's play. It was called "Operation Baby King" and the kids did great. It was a sting operation to make sure everyone understood the Baby Jesus came for ALL PEOPLE!!

Here is Miss Sass herself....The names blond.....Jane Blond.

And last but not least...here's my baby girl and myself. She'd already gotten rid of the tie. And...Oh dear hairdresser..I know you had surgery, but can you just look at this hair??? I need you.........before Christmas!!

Have a great Monday!

Really Liking Her Way of Thinking...Updated

Little Ann: "Mom, I think I'm going to make a schedule for Christmas Eve since it's at our house"..."Won't it be neat?..We won't even have to leave."

Mom: "Yeah, I know, that will be much easier, huh?"

(Little Ann goes and get's her pencil and paper and walks around checking things out)

Little Ann: "We haven't had Christmas here in a long time...I want everything to be perfect."

(Little Ann pausing for a moment in deep thought)

Little Ann: "Mom, we really need to clean the house."

Mom: "Yeah, I know that too, but we've still got a few days."

(Little Ann writes a few things down)

Little Ann: "How do you spell appetizers?"

Mom: "A P P E T I Z E R S"

(Little Ann taking note of all my scrapbooking supplies in the corner of the dining room)

Little Ann: "Mom, that stuff's in the way." "You really need to build onto the house so you can move that cart and have your own place for all your scrapbook stuff."

(Chuckling to myself)

Mom: "Yeah, that would be really nice....wish I had some money."

Mom is really liking Little Ann's way of thinking!!!

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Update: Found this lying on the couch...Too cute.

She's Here...and it's about time!

If you missed all the hype of Chickadee's big day, just scroll down and read. It was a pretty exciting but tiring day for her. I just wanted to let everyone know that the baby has finally arrived..via cesarean. I'm not sure of details like the exact time and length, etc...but my friend who is there says she resembles Milo and only weighed in at 6 pounds and 12 ounces. I will give her the glory of telling you her name and all the glorious intimate details. At least you guys can pray for them and know all is well. Goodnight.

Baby News! One More Progress Update!

Although my friend, Chickadee and I are the same age, she is much braver (or crazier) than I. For this post is not about MY baby news....(I think I would just have to committ myself), but about hers. Because not only is she my dear friend and the one who introduced me into this world of "blog", but I know we have several of the same readers, so I thought I would keep you updated on her behalf today.
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Update 5: 10:55 - I just got word that sadly, but for the best, she is going to have to resort to a cesarean section. I am assuming they are doing that right now. Not sure because they aren't letting any visitors back. Clark came out to inform family who are waiting. I hate that for her especially after 3 the other way, but she is so tired. One good thing is that she can now say she has experienced both. Please say a prayer for them tonight.

Update 4: The latest update I have just gotten is from another one of my friends who is waiting. It is 9:25 and the doctor has gone to deliver another baby as Chickadee is resting from all her hard work at the moment. No baby yet. Keep your fingers crossed...I voted for the 19th!! I'm almost there! (no, really, I wouldn't wish another 2 1/2 hours of pushing on her for any amount on a Target gift card!)

Update 3: I just got in and called Clark to check on Chickadee. He says she is in some pain, but fully dialated and ready to push. It is around 7:00 right now and the doctor is on his way. Clark seems calm. I could hear the TV in the background and he informed me he was watching an episode of Seinfield. Isn't that just like a man. This is number 4 so I guess he's used to the birthing process. I will let you know when the sweet one arrives!

Update 2: It's 2:15 and I just checked in with Chickadee and although she hasn't seen the doctor all day, the nurse has come in and determined that she has dialated to a 4. I'll be out for a while, but plan on checking back in when I get home later.

Update 1: It is around 11:20 this Thursday morning. She told us that she had to be at the hospital at 5:00 am this morning for her induction because she obviously did not go on her own. I just spoke with Clark and he informed me that she hasn't had any change since starting on the med's this morning about 8:00. I will report again soon!!